17 Days Left - Fighting Back The Scream

I feel like opening my mouth and screaming. A shrilling scream out of frustration! Instead I keep my mouth closed, take a deep breath in and let it out with a hearty woosah!

Things aren't exactly panning out how I planned. I had a set back of summer plans earlier this year. I was supposed to do two creative seminars for kids at a summer camp, anti-bullying presentations for another summer camp, and teach art classes for a school. Everything fell through. It had nothing to do with the people that offered me the positions. They were on top of things as was I. It just happened to pan out how it did.

I would be a liar if I said that I wasn't concerned. I was concerned...extremely concerned! And on top of that a few of my massage clients had to cancel for the whole month of June. It had me on pins and needles wondering how I was going to make ends meet. I prayed and cried, and cried and prayed, and trusted God. I decided to look for jobs  that centered around the arts (to no avail because I found nothing).  Then things started to open up again! It all of a sudden made sense why all those things needed to fall through, for greater opportunities were lying ahead.

So here it is, day 17 and the art show is almost the least of my worries. I am on track with the things that I need to get done on that front. I am creating like nobodies business and reading up on what I need to do to make sure that the show is a success (at least to the best of my ability).

What is the worry then? I'm feeling derailed again! Plan A fell through to make way for plan B, and now it seems that plan B is trying to fall apart too! My money is once again super funny, and Emmy's check engine light is on once again (that's a whole different story).  It's spreading me thin. It's causing me to think of various ways to make ends meet. And more than anything, causing me to continue to rely on God.

The land of reliance on God...a good place to be.  I know that for sure. This land is familiar, a land that I have found value living in. And while it's a familiar and valuable land, it never feels completely comfortable. It's a place of uncertainty. It's a place of complete and utter trust in an all Encompassing Entity. Despite the above feelings, I'm sheltered in this land. I get direction here and ultimately the peace of knowing that I am on the right path.

So if nothing else, I can say that these times have caused me to become a resourceful chickadee. I have a resilience that I wouldn't have if everything was peachy keen! I have that to be grateful for!

Your Thoughts:
What are your views on derailed plans? Do you see the derailments as a good or bad thing?

Until next time...