God Please...

In my lifetime I have had a lot of "God please..." moments. You know...God please get me out of this jam that I have gotten myself in. God please don't let this car accident happen. God please let the man that I adore so, adore me in return. God please let the sun stay out all day today. God please make me feel better. God please let me get the biggest piece of cake. I mean the list goes on an on, from the most important to the silliest of things. But today I find myself asking a whole different collection of "God please..." questions. 

God please grant me the opportunity to help others above and beyond what I can imagine. God please allow me to always have a sunny disposition. God please allow me to always know that my education means nothing if I am not in the position to pass what I learn on. God please allow me to treat others as I desire to be treated myself. God please never let me become a pretentious individual. God please always allow me to be open to receive from those that are more seasoned than myself. And God please when I become seasoned show me how to mentor without belittling. 

I'm in no way shape, form or fashion perfect. I have my fair share of crappy days (my closest friends will tell you). I'm more likely to cry those crappy days away or remain silent. I've never been one to lash out or become extremely mean. That's just never been my M.O. (mode of operandi).  This post is nothing more than me ranting about what is in this noggin of mine. 

However, what I am learning (for as hard as it may for me to digest) is that everyone doesn't care to have the bubbly, glass always half full personality like mine. Their way of life and way of seeing things is completely different. And it is my job to know that and still remain my good ole' happy self, which at times feels virtually impossible! It's the, punch me in the left boobie and I'll give you the right adage (it's really the cheek, but if you're a woman and have ever been hit in the chest, it hurts far worse than the cheek). 

So in the midst of my "God pleases.." and learning to accept that I (like everyone else) have my own unique personality to handle my purpose, I inhale deeply and release the fresh breath of "it's okay". As a matter of fact in the midst of my rantings...it's more than just okay. I am right where I am supposed to be!

Your Thoughts:

Have you ever had or do you have a list of "God please..."? If so, have you found them to be nothing more than opportunities to grow into the individual you were placed on this planet to be?

Until next time... 

Where Did Motivation Go?

I haven't been feeling all that motivated today. I woke up with about a million things going through my mind.

And as if I needed another thing on my mind, the phone rang. I looked at the 866 number and decided to answer because I was almost sure it was for me. I knew it was probably someone looking for money that isn't in my possession right now.

I was right! It was the thorn in my side...Sallie Mae! I know that these loans that she delves out I took. I get it! I had to though. Much like the majority of those that attend college, I didn't have the funds to pay my way outright. I can't stand her! I would say I hate her, but hate is not a vocabulary word that I like to use. So we will stick with me having a strong dislike for her.

I'm off that soapbox! Me complaining about Sallie Mae isn't going to change a thing about my situation. So I move on and help others make wiser choices. And although I almost slid completely off my square when Sallie called and motivation was close to non-existent, I got up anyway.

I worked out, and then got to work on building stretchers for my next paintings. I am not sure what I was thinking though. For the first time since college I built my canvases from scratch. That means I purchased the wood, had it cut down to size, and then cut the ends on a 45 degree angle myself. Now that doesn't sound so bad, and it's not within itself. However, I decided to cut the 45 degree angle manually using a miter box and a hand held saw. It's not like I don't have an electric saw. I just thought that it would be cool to do it manually. I mean artists of the old days had to cut the wood by hand. They didn't have an electric saw at their disposal. However, God made new things for a reason, and I plan to make use of the new next time!

So despite not feeling real motivated today I decided to show up and get the job done, and done well anyhow. That's how champions are made. They show up to the plate even when they don't really feel like it. I'm in the game and ready to win!

Your Thoughts:
When is the last time you did something the long way on purpose?

Until next time...

A Vision

It's Saturday night and my day was pretty full. Actually, this whole week was pretty full.

All week we had dedication week at the place I fellowship. I ended up painting for two nights (Wednesday and Friday). I got the vision for the painting only a few days before, which usually rocks my nerves. I never thought I would become okay with getting the vision for what I was to create a few day, a few hours or a few moments before I needed to create it. But this time I had no choice but to trust my Spirit man. I trusted the God that is in me. Honestly coming off the week of my show I was to exhausted to do otherwise. Too exhausted to worry and/or stress about what I was going to paint.  And it worked out!

I prayed and God politely answered and gave me a vision of an open mouth with water being poured into by a clay jar. The piece is called, "Thirst No More". It's what I imagine Christ saying to the Samaritan woman at the well..."but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water in them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life."

It reminded me of my thirst for Him and to ultimately live out my purpose. It reminded me that if I am obedient to that which He desires for me, my purpose will go forth with excellence. I will thirst no more for those things that don't line up with with my purpose!

It's the revelation in the simple things that make me so happy! The journey is getting interesting, and I am looking forward to seeing what it brings about!

Your Thoughts:
Where does  your inspiration come from? How do you best convey your inspiration to others?

Until next time...

The Tendency

I have lots of things to accomplish now. I know that in my mind. I've listed those things in previous posts. A few days ago I was on top of things. I managed to get the database done, and sent out a few thank you emails. However, since then....hmph!

I think that my mind wants to fall into what "the tendency" is. You know...bask in the victory...enjoy the sun while it's shining...stop to smell the flowers of this win!  I want to do all of that, but I know that there is so much more work that lies ahead. 

This may sound odd, but I have been thinking some of the same "I'm not sure I can do this" thoughts as I did before my show. Now, I know that I can, and I know that I will, but that doesn't stop the thoughts from coming. I fight them off with a stick and words of affirmation (scripture for the most part). But really what is next? I've got plans laid out, written down visions of the next steps, but how in the world do I get started on the "next"?

I often think of stars that make it big, and how they came to do so. Trust me, I don't want to be a star in the lime light. I am not start struck, and neither do I want others to be star struck over me. However, what I do desire to do is to make an impact in this world, as many stars have. I want to enlarge God's territory. I want to leave an amazing legacy for my children, my family, my friends, my acquaintances, and even my enemies. I want to do all of this through my creative endeavors. 

 

I left out the "I want to get paid" part, but we all know that to be the case. If I am honest, I want to make a lot of money so that I can bless others. It would be nice to be able to pay some poor students (who hasn't been a student for 15 years) school loans off. Who knows...that poor student could be you! I want to be able to do random acts of kindness for people unrecognized. 

For all of this to be accomplished, I would need to get off the "I'm not sure I can do it" train. So that is exactly what I will do. I will believe that just as I completed the last large task of having my first art show, I can and will do even greater things to come!

Your Thoughts:

Do you ever have an "I'm not sure I can do this" moment? How do you overcome those moments? 

Until next time...

Getting the Records Straight

Today and the next few days will be days of getting some records in order.

Some years ago I had the notion that I didn't really need to have a mailing list for my art business. I was interested in the creating portion only. Side note...I still am! Now I just recognize that I need to do the work that I don't want to (the dirty work) until I have the means to pay someone who can do it for me. Besides it is always good to be in the know in all areas of your business.

So today I created a database of those that came to my art show. I thought that this would be a good time as ever to start.  It's a small start, but humble beginnings bring about a bountiful harvest! 

Your Thoughts:
What were you humble beginnings?

Until next time...

The Days After

I did it...certainly not alone, but I did it! The art show was a success!

I know I dropped the ball with posting a few fays before the show, but I was swamped! In addition to getting prepared for my show,  I was  looking for a job, rehearsing for an upcoming dedication week, and visiting with lots of family.  Oh and let's not forget working!

Saturday was simply amazing! I have support beyond my wildest dreams, and this is just the start! Not only did my local family and friends attend, but I had friends come from NY, MD, and North Jersey for my event. Sometimes we don't recognize how much we are loved, and if I didn't know by the end of Saturday night, then I will never know!

I sold, I was commissioned for a few pieces, and networked...networked...networked! Tom and Josh (the owners of the Factory) were super personable as usual, and made everything so fun and easy. Amy (Tom's wife) was so sweet. We chatted for a bit about life, family, the future of the Factory,  and my creative/art career. She looks forward to helping me on my journey, and I'm looking forward to soaking up any information that they have about business.

It's Monday now,  and the momentum can't stop! In the days to come I'll be sending out personal thank you notes to those that attended, and starting a database.  In the weeks to come I will be working on branding, marketing and advertising for a new project that I am resurrecting.  I will write a kickstarter proposal for this project. And in the months to come, I will be creating, writing, blogging, looking to have studio space, and networking out the wazoo.

I am blessed! I am fortunate to have this opportunity! I am loved beyond measure! I am experiencing life, and fulfilling purpose! Thank you for continuing on this ride with me! It is sure to get real live!

Your Thoughts:

Is it a sad, happy or indifferent feeling when you have completed an enormous task?

Until next time...

1 Day Left - Peace

It's hard to believe that I only have 1 day left before my show!

My mom asked me earlier if I was nervous. And the answer is no. I'm neither excited nor anxious...I just am! That means I am not subscribing to any sort of emotion actually. I am just in work mode.

I will say that I have a peace about things though. The quiet still feeling comes from a surety that I have that this is indeed what I am supposed to be doing. I was made for this!

My friends and family will be there! Those from outside will be there! There will be men, women, and children. And I will be ready to receive and greet them...and you too!

I know I still have yet to talk about my future plans of asking, but I will share in the days after my show.

Your Thoughts:

Are your nerves rattled before a big event?

Until next time...

2 Days Left - A Nightmare

I dream often. Lots of times it's God's way of communicating with me. Sometimes it's the high calorie food that I at before my head hit the pillow and my eyes closed to slip into that REM sleep. Either way, I don't typically have nightmares. They may be a little disturbing, but never a true nightmare. Well, last night I had a NIGHTMARE! 

It was the day of my show. I had just hoped out of the shower, and I was rushing. The exit your shower and step on your towel and almost trip sort of rushing. My mother and I were having a horrible argument about something. It may have been about a dish or clothes or mail or something like that. We were screaming at the top of our lungs. And in the midst of screaming my cousin calls and asks where I am. He points out that I am late to my own show. He and several other people were waiting. He asked where the artwork was. I looked around and couldn't find my pieces. I remember knowing that they were around somewhere, but that I hadn't found the time to prepare them to hang. I asked my mother to put some nails in her purse and coerced her that we had to get going and quickly. Then the dream nightmare...ended!

I know...it won't happen! For one, I am preparing in advance. That means that I am on track to have the hardware that I need to hang my pieces. I am also hanging my show on Friday so that Saturday all I really need to do is show up, be the bubbly individual that I am, and sell, sell, sell!

So I guess it wasn't a nightmare as much as it was a simple dream. I suppose it may be what happens when your first show is 2 days away!

Your Thoughts:

Do you have nightmares or odd dreams about the "big" thing that you are about to embark on?

Until next time...

3 Days Left - Arghh

There are 3 days left and success and failure seem to be swimming in the same pool!

I decided to turn my back on my office today and have a little cup of joe at a place called Groove Grounds in Collingswood. I thought a change of scenery would do me some good, plus I needed to go to the Factory one last time before hanging on Friday.

I had 4 things on my agenda for this afternoon. I was to get my resume revised so I can send it out to perspective employers (remember I am attempting to get a J.O.B), write up my artist bio, artist statement, and exhibition statement. I worked on a little of one here, and a little of one there, never completing any. When I got frustrated with one, I would go to the next. Then when I got frustrated with that one, I would return to the one I started with. While I managed to get a few solid sentences down in each, the cycle was nasty, and so unproductive for the most part. It really pushed back my research for the proposal that I said I was going to talk about today in yesterdays post.

So now I am left with trying to complete this (another daunting task for me) this evening before I get some shut eye, which would be my best friend if I could get a good handle on smaller things I must get finished.

Well, I'm off the soapbox and I guess I shouldn't beat myself up so bad. These documents aren't just for right now, but for the future also. It would behoove me to take the time needed to make them great!

Your Thoughts:
Do you have problems writing in detail about yourself for the masses to read? If so, why?

Until next post...

4 Days Left - Asking For Help

There are really just 4 days left (not counting the day of) to the show, and today was extremely productive! I had a long list of to-do's today and I am happy to say that the majority of them are done. And the night is still not over young chaps! I am going to make the most of every moment.

Part of that moment includes writing a proposal to ask for some help from readers like you! About a week ago I sat down with a dear friend and fellow blogger. We were talking about the art of giving and receiving, and how often times it is difficult for a person who naturally likes to give to receive. She made mention of this TED video that she had watched by a woman named Amanda Palmer. The almost 15 minute clip was called, "The Art of Asking".

In "The Art of Asking", Amanda (an alternate rock icon) shows us the incredible ease behind the simple task of asking for help. She reasons that there is an innate desire for everyone to want to help in some form or fashion. For her, it was fulfilling the needs of her and her band on different levels. In one place they needed some equipment. In another their needs included a place to lay their heads and nourishment. And still in another, something as simple as a neti pot. Their fans went above and beyond on a consistent basis. They truly wanted to help. Not merely because she was going to give them a show (sometimes free), but because there was a connection that was formed. A bond! And I would venture to say that is worth more than a show any day!

Let's paint a picture (since I like painting). Your favorite artist is performing a concert 300 miles away from you, but in their travels something happens to their mode of transportation and they get stuck in your town (100 miles away from the closest city). They put the call out for help from their fans, and you happen to be the first to respond. They decide that you are the one whose help they need, and stay with you for the evening. When they arrive they don't just tolerate you, but decide to spend time with you. There was a connection formed that many others could only dream of...priceless!

I've never been one to really ask for help. Call it having an "I can do it by myself" attitude or pride...asking was simply not my thing. However, the talk I had with my friend and Amanda's speech made sense. Why wouldn't people want to help me? Why  wouldn't they want to sow into something that I was doing that was meaningful? Of course they would. They did it before and I believe they would do it again. I truly believe that people find value in purpose, and someone who is vigorously going after their purpose.

So I've decided to stick my neck out there and put my pride on the line and just do it!

I'M ASKING FOR HELP!!!

How? That's tomorrows post. Tonight I have a bit more research to do!

Your Thoughts:
Is it difficult for you to ask for help? If so, why? If not, what advice can you offer to others that would make it easier for them to ask for the help they need?

Until next post...

5 Days Left - Northern Liberties 2nd Street Festival

The 5th day is coming to a close, and it was quite the colorful week to say the least. I got a lot of family time in (as you know from previous posts), and got the work that was on my to-do list done as well.

Today was low-key. I went to church  in the city with a few friends and then to the 2nd street fair in Northern Liberties. I visit the art hub quite frequently. I have a good friend that lives there. However, I had never been to the 2nd Street Fair. It was exciting! They closed the whole street off from about Girard to Spring Garden. There were several bands and DJ's playing on different stages. There were vendors lined against both sides of the streets with all types of hustles from jewelry to insurance, and everything in between. There were foods of every kind to fit the mood of the visitors taste buds. 

All in all, it was fun! I was able to talk to a few artists that created their own jewelry. I even got a few compliments on my own pieces that I happened to be wearing. I try to make it a point to wear a piece of mine always so that I can advertise. 

Aside from that, I did a few things for business in the wee hours of the morning after I posted yesterday, including challenging myself to doing some tasks that I will post about tomorrow. 

This week has truly been more than a girl could ask for. A whole lot of family, a helping of R and R, with some business on the side!

Your Thoughts:
"They" say business is not to be mixed with pleasure. Do you find that to be true for you? 

Until next time...

6 Days Left - Ready To Dive

It's almost the end of day 6 and I must say, I am feeling pretty grounded. I have had a wonderful week with my family and have managed to get work done at the same time, which leads me to...the pursuit of a job.

This past week was a definite eye opener. This may sound odd to some, but I believe that God is grooming me to be an amazing multi-tasker. I have talked about this before, but from a half-hearted sort of belief that I could.

The reality is, I can actually multi-task well. I can be this worker that is good for an employer, and my own business' best employee. I can stay focused enough to create after work hours. I can...I can...I can!

So here I am this late evening, excited about what is ahead.  I am now a whole-hearted believer embarking on new territory here people, and loving it! This week with my family proved that I could fulfill purpose and have a great time doing it. It has taught me that I need to stay focused now more than ever.

I'm ready!

Your Thoughts:
When is the last time you really felt ready to take a dive into scary territory?

Until next post...

7 Days Left - A Solo Exhibition Trip

Day 7 is almost gone with the wind, and the best laid out plans sometimes go awry. We could either look at them as curses or blessing. This weekend and typically I look at them as blessings!

My family reunion has been cancelled, but I got to hang out with my adorable babies and much missed sister, my nana, and before the rest of the weekend is over I will hang out with more family.  So it has been a family reunion of sort, and I'm okay with that!

Tonight I went into the city for a few hours for a solo exhibition at the Philadelphia Sculpture Gym called "Flat As Hell". The exhibition was great! The artist, Jedediah Morfit had these wild depictions of ordinary and not so ordinary items that were made from mostly urethane plastic, paint, wood and nails. 

I was invited by one of my former UArts students by the name Jenny Welsh.  I knew that she created her work there (she's a sculptor artist), but I had no idea that she was second in command. I am super proud of her! An excellent woman and artist!

I met a few other artists from various backgrounds. I invited some that I had conversations with to my show next week. Some even knew about The Factory! I was in my element. I felt at home!

I needed to go, and I needed to do this one by myself. I needed to see how others conduct their shows. I needed to see how the artist moved about the crowd and talked about his pieces. I needed to see how others responded to his work. It was good. It was all good! I have a new confidence! I am surely on the right path...doing the right thing!

Your Thoughts:
When is the last time you felt confident about what you were created to do? What helped you to get there?

Until next time...

8 Days Left - Pricing and Signing Done

It's day 8 and my babies have left. They will be headed back home tomorrow to start school in the next few weeks.

After getting over the brief sadness (with no tears..thank God) of them leaving, work began again. I put on my big girl pants and did it! I priced every last piece that will be for sale next Saturday. Once I put my mind to it needing to be done...it was a breeze.

I also managed to make sure that I signed and dated each piece. It's something that I don't typically do until a piece is sold. However since each piece will be sold on Saturday, I must be prepared!

Tomorrow I will be going to an art opening at the Philadelphia Sculpture Garden. It will be my first time going to the venue. I have a former student from UArts that has studio space there.  It is not her show, but she invited me and I am making it a point to go. As a matter of fact, I am making it a point to immerse myself into more of the arts scene in my surrounding area. I look forward to seeing what  new and exciting connections will come of it!

Your Thoughts:
When is the last time you completed a huge task? What was it, and how did completing it make you feel?

Until next time...

9 Days Left - Family Time

Day 9 is almost over, and I am just making it by the skin of my teeth yet again!

Today I had the privilege of hanging out with my niece and nephews. I love them so much! This is the first time I have seem them in the last 3 years, and it's funny because although life has happened, it has stood still all at the same time. Time has passed and my babies have gotten older, but the relationship remains the same. We pick right back up where we left off when we last saw each other.

I get plenty of hugs and kisses and give plenty of them out. I know that I am loved and they are reassured in return that they are too! This is what life is about...building and maintaining relationships with loved ones, and I choose to live in this moment for the brief time that it is here. Tomorrow will come swiftly and before I blink they will be on their way to return home until the next time we see each other.

They (my babies) and my sister and brother will miss my art show. They have been asking plenty of questions about it though. I answered and and told them that I will take plenty of pictures and short videos so that they will be in the loop and can see what is going on.

Time will pass and they will grow,  but our love for each other will never change!

Your Thoughts:
Is there someone special that you haven't seen in a long time? How do you maintain a healthy relationship while they are gone?

Until next time...